Picture this if you will:. a woman about five feet six inches tall, wrapped in a towel armed with a spray can and a rusty old hammer steeling herself for the battle with the enemy. Who is this brave warrior princess of the Bop Clan and who is the enemy that would dare some against someone armed with The Hammer of Rusted Destruction?
Stay tuned to find out but before we jump in let's just add in one more character the mix. I want to introduce you to the Bajan Coward, the Queen of Elevation and Sovereign Ruler of the safety of the twenty square inch dining room chair. That monarch of meekness my readers is none other that yours truly.
Let's dive in to the scene:
I was laying down in my cot enjoying the quiet of the night and a good book when I was moved to go to the bathroom. On my return I was struck dumb by the sight of a behemoth centipede, in my estimation at least eleven inches long wriggling its way from my room into my parent's bedroom.
"Oh no!" I exclaimed, glued to my spot in the corridor.
In the ensuing moments, my best friend emerged from her room and asked me in a fervent tone of concern what was the matter.
"It's another one," I bemoaned.
"Not another centipede!" she queried, peering around the corner but holding safe distance, "This simply isn't funny, you just had one of those a couple weeks ago."
"I know," I moaned, "But it's another one and it seemed even bigger than the last one."
"Oh no," she said echoing my previous state of disbelief.
"Exactly!" I added feeling that she was finally understanding of my plight.
She forged forward in her bravery to look into my parent's room to try to espy the villain. She commented that she didn't see it but I assured her that it was indeed there. We heard an ominous scratching sound but yet nothing was in evidence.
She mentioned again that she didn't see it and then noticing that I had not moved from my spot in the corridor:
"I don't see it, maybe it left, you can move."
"No way," I said vehemently, shaking my head, "I am only sure about the safety of these ten square inches and I refused to move."
She thought I was joking, but as the moments ticked on she realised I was quite serious. Then another scratching noise and then I heard her cry out.
"Oh my god, it is bigger than the last one...where's the spray,"
We both looked at each other as a horrible truth dawned, the spray was in my parent's bedroom with the beast.
"Well isn't that lovely!" she said with a voice loaded with sarcasm. I could only agree. I was recounting to myself that moments like this really separated out the cowards from the brave. I knew which camp I was in, and in my kingdom of the corridor, I presided without shame.
Suddenly she shrieked and like a scout giving warning said:
"It's coming out and heading your way."
I took flight with a fair amount of expressive ambient noise (ergo shrieking) as I relocated myself from the corridor up into the nearest chair. My best friend similarly joined me in the land of the above, planting her feet firmly in a chair across the table from me,
The beast seemingly sensing our frenzy made a bee line for the chair where my best friend was perched and she hopped from the chair to the table. Even in my terror I was able to laugh at how terribly absurd we were both being at that moment.
"It's heading for the door," my best friend noted, and she bravely hopped down to open the door. Then the silliness took a turn for the ridiculous as we urged with great urging for the beast to use the door and go outside.
"Leave! Go!" she urged.
"Yes!!" I cried, pumping my hands triumphantly as the foul best wriggled its way out the door.
"Shut the damn door!" I hollered and my best friend did so.
In the aftermath, I was still in an armchair, as we nervously laughed and talked about how lucky we were that it took itself out of the house. Having worked up quite the sweat, my best friend said she was off to take a bath and changed into her towel.
She noted again that I was still rooted to my armchair.
"You can move now," she urged but I shook my head. I had the feeling that it would come back but I didn't share that with her. She tried to coax me to go back to reading some more but eventually gave up heading for the bath.
Just as she went to shut the door, I heard an scritching noise...
"Is that you?" I queried hopefully.
"Me that ..what?" she asked, stepping back out the bathroom and easing down the corridor.
"Shh.. listen.." I urged her...
She did and I did and we did hear something again.
"You have to joking," she murmured.
I was hoping too but then I saw the black creature snake it way across my bedroom floor and disappear under one of the baseboards.
"No, it's back..." I said, sounding far calmer than I was feeling. The centipede had returned...
Will our heroes survive a second encounter with the many-legged beast? Stay tuned to find out.